Cupid Wolvie: A Danger Room Romance
by J.C. Thomas
Summary: Parody to Traps. Allana and Scott???? Read and find out...
1. Default Chapter

Hello everyone. ( This is Jessica, better known as Jasper. Here's your stupid SCOLLANA! I hope you're happy! I know this will probably not enhance my review status since everyone loves Allana. All right, I'm just joking. Although I'm a little jealous, I had fun writing this and you better like it. This takes place in the twisted minds of Logan, Allana, and Scott… It's really obvious which chapters are Allana's and Scott's, but I marked Logan's chapters. Just to be safe… Enjoy!  
  
***  
  
Prologue:  
  
What am I doing? What…am…I…doing? I thought I was trying to get Scott and Rogue together. If so, then why bring Peitro into this? Conflict, of course. It would make something exciting happen in boring, old Bayville. Having Scott fighting Peitro for Rogue instead of Scott fighting Duncan for Jean. But why did I care? To help Rogue. But somewhere along the way, it stopped being about Rogue. And Peitro. So with them cancelled out all that was left was Scott.  
  
"Hey, Allana." Scott's voice said jarring me out of my thoughts. We were sitting at the table for dinner.  
  
"What, Prick?" I said trying to sound normal.  
  
"What did I do now?" He asked offended.  
  
"Nothing, you never do anything. It's just fun." I answered staring at my food.  
  
"Well, I hope you have fun in the Danger Room after dinner." Logan said. I just shrugged. I was too tired and too involved in my thoughts to argue that it was unfair and that I didn't do anything wrong. Maybe sometime in the Danger Room will help me sort out my thoughts.  
  
"Dizzy, are you alright, you like your in the zone." Jasper asked concerned. "Why you not eating?"  
  
"No, I'm fine. I'm not really hungry." I said pushing my food around on my plate.  
  
"Well, then you can hit the Danger Room now." Logan said.  
  
"Okay." I said standing up and walking to my room. I changed into my x-suit and went to the Danger Room where Logan was waiting for me.  
  
"How long do you want me in here?" I asked.  
  
"An hour." He answered. I shrugged again and went inside the Danger Room. That whole hour was spent thinking. At the end of the hour I came to the conclusion that I WANTED SCOTT! I didn't want Jean or Rogue to have him. I wanted him. I didn't want him fighting for them. I wanted him fighting for me. What am I thinking? I don't want Scott, I can't want Scott, I hate Scott!!! I have to hate Scott. These thoughts plagued me all night. I could barely sleep. When I did sleep I had dreams of Scott. The creepiest one was a dream in which I was in a '50's sundress and Scott looked like stepped straight out of a swing-dancing Gap commercial. We were married and had two kids (a boy and girl) and we lived the '50's lifestyle. I woke up in a sweat. I do like Scott.  
  
  
  
  
  
Chapter One:  
  
The next day (Saturday) I did busy work to keep my mind off of Scott. I did at least two weeks worth of Mutants Anonymous. Then I typed a 3- page essay on how much I hated Scott. Five seconds later I wrote a 3-page essay contradicting everything I had just wrote. Frustrated I went downstairs to hangout with Jasper and Tobias. Jasper was on the couch watching Tobias and Kurt battling it out on a video game. Jasper was coaching Tobias so I took it upon myself to join them and coach Kurt. This went on for about an hour with Kurt and me in the lead when Scott walked in. He took a seat between Jasper and me on the couch.  
  
Hey guys, what's up?" He said stretching his arms out on the back of the couch. Tobias and Kurt simultaneously lifted a hand as a non-moving wave acknowledging his existence, but not lifting their eyes from the screen.  
  
"WUZZZUUPPP!!!" Jasper yelled sticking her tongue out. She was hyper pretty much all afternoon.  
  
"Jas! How much was your sugar intake today, Hon."  
  
"New candy store in mall, me, Kurt, and Tobias got from samples of everything cause I work at the mall and I got an employer discount." She said really fast.  
  
"Nooo!" Tobias exclaimed as he lost another round to Kurt. "Jasper you is supposed to be helping me win."  
  
"I'm sorry, baby!" Jasper gasped, covering her mouth. Then she crawled off of the couch leaving and Scott on the couch. Ignore him, I thought to myself, stay as far as possible from him. I scooted to the other end of the couch so I wouldn't be near him and played intent attention on Kurt playing.  
  
"Kurt, go into the cave. You can beat Tobias to the finish point."  
  
"Not if the troll is in there. Then it will kill Kurt and he won't make it to the finish point. Gee, you're smart." Scott replied matter-of- factly. I nearly got whiplash as I turned to the boy who must have lost his mind questioning my intelligence. The whole room got quiet. Kurt paused the game preparing to stop me from another fight in which, this time, I didn't start. I got angry and stood up and Scott stood ready to fight.  
  
"Allana, he ain't worth it. Just sit and chill." Jasper said. Kurt positioned himself between Scott and me. I had two choices 1: I could pound his face in and get in trouble. 2: Or just walk away. Making my choice I turned and quickly walked quietly out of the room. I walked up to my room, changed into some sweats, and hit the track. I ran into Logan who was looking a book on ancient ways of torture. A book I bought for him.  
  
"Hey, Little Twister. What are you doing out here?"  
  
"Bout to run." I answered. Logan nearly dropped his book.  
  
"Without me telling you to?" He asked. "You hate running."  
  
"Only when it's a punishment. If its choice then it's all right." I explained.  
  
"Uh huh." Logan replied in disbelief. I just jogged on to the track. I ran for 3 hours. When I stopped I could barely breath and I was sweating a river. I walked over to where Logan was and he handed and he handed me a bottle of water.  
  
"You must have something your mind." He said. "Something that's really bugging you."  
  
"What makes say that?" I asked drinking thirstily.  
  
"I can smell it on ya." He laughed. "Wanna talk about it?"  
  
"Not really. I just wanna not think about it." I said sitting on the ground stretching my legs. But I did think about it. I mentally reviewed the reasons why I couldn't like Scott. One reason was because I wanted to kill him for what he said 3 hours ago. If I liked I wouldn't want to kill him. The second was because we hated each other. I hated him; he hated me. What kind of relationship would that be. I went through all the reasons I could think of but the matter how much I tried of but no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise I still liked Scott. The door of the mansion opened snapping me out of my thoughts. I looked up to see Scott.  
  
"See ya later, Logan," I sad getting up, "Gotta jet." I added as I pushed passed Scott and went into mansion.  
  
Chapter Two: Wolverine  
  
"What was Allana doing out here?" Scott asked as Allana rushed into the mansion.  
  
"Running." I answered. Scott's face grew more confused.  
  
"Why? She didn't do anything!" He asked defensively.  
  
"She chose to. She just came out here and ran. I had nothing to do with it, Scott." I said turning back to my book. "Did you need something?"  
  
"No, I was just worried about Allana."  
  
"Why?" I asked.  
  
"Well, I kind got an attitude with her earlier and she didn't insult me or try to pound my face in. And now she's running without being told."  
  
"Maybe, she's trying not to get in trouble this weekend."  
  
"Maybe." He shrugged and left. I could have laughed out loud at what had just happened. Only two observations could be made: 1: Allana likes Scott. 2: Scott likes Allana. It was so obvious I'm surprised they don't know it. Allana, like a third grader, shows her affection by being a bully to Scott. She doesn't do it to anyone else. Scott, you can tell because he hates getting in fights with Allana. The only reason he gets into it with Allana when she insults him is because he doesn't want to seem like a coward in front of her. Now Allana has realized that she likes Scott, which explains why she's ignoring him. Now we only have to see if Scott knows or if he will start to show that he likes her.  
  
Chapter Three:  
  
Okay. So it was obvious Allana was avoiding me. You'd think I'd be glad to get Allana off my back. I admit, I'm a little relieved, but I'm worried. Something was bothering Allana and I'm starting to worry. I was lying back on my bed when Jasper walked in.  
  
"Knock knock." She said waiting to be fully invited in.  
  
"Com in." I said sitting u in my bed.  
  
She walked over and sat across from me. "What's up with you and Allana?" She asked bluntly.  
  
"Nothing. Why?"  
  
"Well, she's not acting normal. Did you say something to upset her?" She asked.  
  
"What if she never insults you ever again?"  
  
"That would be weird. Freaky." I said. Jasper started humming the theme song to the twilight zone. Even though I know I get annoyed with her I don't want to go my whole life without her talking (insulting) to me. First I'll ask her what's wrong and if that doesn't work I'll move on to plan B, when I find out what that is.  
  
Chapter Four:  
  
I was on my computer playing solitaire when Scott knocked. Why won't he leave me alone? The day I decide to not insult him and he wants to follow me. I waved at him but kept up the silent treatment.  
  
"Can I come in?" He asked. I nodded. You might as well; you already disturbed me. He walked in and sat on Jasper's bed, which was closer to the computer.  
  
"Can we talk?" I nodded again. No, you can talk, I won't.  
  
"Well, you're acting kinda weird, you know upset and I was wondering if it was what I said earlier." He paused waiting for my response, but I didn't give him the satisfaction, so he continued. "Well, if it is, I'm sorry. It wasn't planned or anything. I just saw it was as opportunity to, you know, one up you. I hope I didn't hurt your feelings or anything." I let out a snort of laughter. Hold up, Scott hurt my feelings? Yeah right.  
  
"This isn't funny, Allana." Oh really, I thought, still giggling. "I'm trying to be nice to you and you laugh at me." I hope I didn't hurt your feelings. By now I was laughing so hard I almost fell out of my seat. Scott got mad and stormed out. Poor baby!  
  
Chapter Five: Wolverine  
  
I watched as Scott stormed into the Danger Room complete with gym clothes and a face to match his sunglasses.  
  
"What are you doing in here?" I asked.  
  
"Simulation." He answered.  
  
"What's with you kids? When I ask you to do something, you don't do it. You don't get in trouble and you run and do simulations when I don't tell you to. Don't you know it's not fun unless it's punishment."  
  
"If it makes you feel better you choose the simulation and how long."  
  
"Well, it's not the same, but okay." I said. So Scott spent and hour on a difficult simulation. Though he seemed preoccupied he hit all the targets and made it out alive. He walked up to where I was in the control room, breathing heavily and sweating. He took off his sweatshirt and I tossed him a bottle of water. He drank half the bottle in one gulp, then leaned against the wall looking lost in thought.  
  
"A penny for your thoughts." I asked.  
  
"Allana." He answered simply.  
  
"Ah, what about her?"  
  
"I can't talk to her."  
  
"It can't be much harder than talking to me could it?"  
  
" Whenever I try to talk to her she either insults me, laughs at me, or gets mad at me."  
  
"Make her real angry." I suggested.  
  
"What are you talking about? I make her mad by breathing."  
  
"Allana is the type of person that pretends to be tough and scares people with empty threats, but if you get her angry enough you'll get an actual emotion out of her."  
  
"Well it's worth the try." He said and walked out.  
  
Chapter Six:  
  
After going to my room and changing I went on my search for Allana. I checked the common's area, her room, the game room, the danger room, every room until I ran into Jasper who told me she went for a drive and probably wouldn't be back till dinner, which was in two hours. So I waited, doing future homework and watching the news to pass the time. Finally Jean walked into let me know it was dinnertime; I walked into the dining room and took a seat next to Jasper. Halfway into dinner, Allana walked in. She paused and sighed in disappointment when she noticed the only seat left was by mine. She sighed again and sat down.  
  
"Where were you this afternoon, Allana?" Professor asked.  
  
"Skat-in'" She said grabbing a plate and filling it with food. Today we had spaghetti, salad, and garlic rolls. "Jas-per?" Allana asked leaning across me to her blue haired friend.  
  
"Ye-es." Jasper responded.  
  
"Can you pass me the ro-olls?" Allana asked.  
  
"Why don't you ask Sco-ott? He's clo-oser." She smiled devishly.  
  
"Because, I'm not talking to Sco-ott." She confessed through her teeth.  
  
"Why no-ot?" Jasper asked still smiling devishly with pure amusement in her eyes.  
  
"Because I… I'm mad at him." Allana answered folding her arms.  
  
"Why?" I asked knowing the answer.  
  
"No reason." She answered obviously not wanting to get into an argument. I shot a look toward Logan regarding our previous discussion, but Allana misinterpreted it.  
  
"Logan, I did not insult Scott, call him any names, get into a fight with him or anything. So I don't believe I should have to run or do any simulations. I was a good girl today." She exclaimed pointing an accusing finger at Logan. Everyone at the table burst into laughter.  
  
"Allana, I sense some pent up frustration due to you going a whole day without insulting Scott." Jasper analyzed trying to sound like a psychologist but failed through her laughter. Allana had gone back to her food.  
  
"Allana?" I asked under the noise.  
  
"What?" She spat stabbing her fork into her spaghetti.  
  
"Why are you mad at me?"  
  
"I'm always mad at you." She shrugged.  
  
"Yeah, but now you're not talking to me." For some reason Allana got frustrated, threw her fork on her plate, and stood up.  
  
"I don't get you, Scott. You always get mad when I insult you and then, when I try to be nice, you still get upset!"  
  
"You're not trying to be nice, you're mad at me and you're afraid to tell me why?" I replied, trying to contain my anger.  
  
"I'm not afraid of anything, Scott. Especially not anything that has to do with you."  
  
"How long does it take you to practice being tough in the morning?" I asked. "No, really. Do you have a little ritual, a little planner of things to say next to insult me? Gosh, Allana, do you have anything better to do than waste your time on me. Really, what makes me so special?" I honestly didn't know where this was coming from.  
  
"Talk about pent up frustration." Tobias replied.  
  
"Shh, I want to hear this." Jasper said covering Tobias's mouth. Through Allana's argument and me I hadn't realized that the table had gotten silent and everyone was involved in the conversation. Like an audience waiting for what was going to happen next. Allana was about to speak, but was interrupted by Logan.  
  
"Scott…Allana…Danger Room… NOW!" He ordered. I don't remember a time when the mansion was so silent. 


	2. Endings

Chapter 7  
  
Everyone followed me into the central mainframe while Scott and Allana were getting ready in the danger room.  
  
    "Logan, are you sure this safe?" Jasper asked in an almost concerned tone.  
  
    "I think this is the only way to get them to get along." I answered.  
  
    "By letting them kill each other." Jasper exclaimed. "Ah, I get it. They can't argue if one or both of them are dead.  
  
    Yeah, that's it, Jasper" I laughed and started the sequence to a jungle simulation.  
  
    "Well since there's nothing I can do, Gambit and I are taking bets."  
  
    "I got $5 on Allana." Professor X said pulling out a five-dollar bill.  
  
Chapter 8  
  
    A jungle scene surrounded Scott and Allana, as they got ready for their battle.  
  
    "I so can't wait to kick your ass." Allana sneered.  
  
    "Shut up and fight." Scott said sending a laser whizzing a millimeter from her ear.  
  
    "Bring it on," she said sending a tornado collecting the laser and sending it back to Scott. "Sorry. This package must be returned to sender." Allana laughed as Scott jumped out of the way and the laser tornado dissolved to nothingness.  
  
    "Ha. Funny." he said as he started to take advantage of his surroundings. He picked up a large stick to hit her with.  
  
    "Stick look familiar to you?" Allana said using a mini tornado to get the stick out of his hand. "I prefer hand to hand, power to power combat."  
  
    "Fine with me." Scott said sending another laser at her.  The fight was getting heated and both were getting exhausted from using their powers. So, they started to fight hand to hand.  Allana punched and kicked Scott and Scott just pushed her away.  
  
    "Come on, Scott, fight back. God, you're a wuss. Come on hit me." Allana taunted. "You must really hide behind your powers."  
  
    "If you weren't a girl, I would hit you." Scott replied, getting annoyed. Allana pounced on him, pinning him on the ground.  
  
    "If you weren't a girl, I'd hit you." Allana smiled. He somehow got out of her grasp and pinned her to the ground.  
  
    "You know, you're such a bitch." Scott scowled. Allana laughed again and pinned him back onto the ground. Without warning Allana kissed and without any thought Scott kissed back. They made out passionately on the floor of the Danger Room. In the central mainframe almost all of the inhabitants were silent except for Jasper, who was rolling on the floor laughing herself to tears. Logan had on a grin of satisfaction on his face as he turned of the simulation.  
  
    Good job The professor said sending him a message in his head.  
  
Chapter 9  
  
    This is not real. I'm not on the Danger Room floor making out with Scott with everyone watching me. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I AM! Get out of here! My mind screamed. And for once my body listened. I pulled myself off of Scott and straightened myself up.  
  
    "I win." I said and ran out of the Danger Room. I ran upstairs, to my room, and into my bathroom. My legs felt heavy, like I had run a 10k marathon. I turned on the faucet, splashed my face with water, and did my world famous exercise of pacing.  
  
    "I did not kiss Scott. Yes I did and everyone saw it. I'm insane! I've lost my mind! I should be committed. "My legs started to burn from pacing and I was on the verge of ripping my hair out. I suddenly heard a knock on the door and turned to see Scott in the doorway. "If you think I kissed you be cause I like you, then your wrong."  
  
    "O.K. Then why did you kiss me?" he asked.  Because I like you, DUH. I thought as Scott walked in and leaned against the wall.  
  
    "I was trying to distract you so I could win." I lied.  
  
    "But, you didn't win. You kissed me and ran away."  
  
    "Well, apparently, my plan didn't work. So I'll go work on it." I walked to the door, trying to make my escaped, but Scott grabbed my arm and pulled me to him. I tried my hardest not to look at him and focused on the floor. Scott, foiling my plans, cupped my chin and lifted his face to mine. Before I could speak,  his lips were on mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me closer. Five seconds (more like five years) later we pulled out of our embrace leaving us in silence.  
  
    "This isn't going to work." I finally said.  
  
    "Well, not with that attitude." He smiled.  
  
    "I hate you." I laughed and punched him in the rib.  
  
    "I know." He replied and he kissed me again. Our kiss was interrupted by a laughter that came from the doorway. We turned to see Logan.  
  
    "Took you long enough." He said and walked away.  
  
THE END  
  
Chapter 10  
  
    "So, what do you think?" I asked as Logan came to the story. "I call it Danger Room Romances."  
  
    "It's good. I especially liked the  "It's not fun unless it's punishment" part." He laughed. "Are you going to post it in Mutants Anonymous?"  
  
    "If Allana and Scott let me and I definitely don't think either of them will go for it unless I change their names."  
  
    "Well, if they give you crap about it I'll put them in the Danger Room." we both laughed. Our laughter was interrupted by Scott and Allana's entrance.  
  
    "Scott...Allana...how much did you hear?" I asked with a nervous giggle.  
  
    "Enough to know that you wrote a story called Danger Room Romances." Allana answered.  
  
    "It has me and Allana in it." Scott added.  
  
    "And we're not going to like it." Allana folded her arms.  
  
    "So hand it over," they both said holding out there hands. I reluctantly handed it over and watched them read it.  
  
The End 


End file.
